It's a Pirates! life for me...

Stop the presses! Er, haul the main sail!

Pirates! In an Adventure with Ahab is available from Amazon! That my store doesn't have it yet is just one more example of the suckiness that is corporate America, but that shouldn't stop the world from worshipping a man with an author's bio like this:

Gideon Defoe, who lives in London, is the author of The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists. The pirate books are just the first stage of his plan to topple the global economy and create a glorious workers’ utopia.

Does that not fill you with the commercialistic need to buy! buy! buy!?

No?

Perhaps a summary might help:

They’re back!!! The Pirate Captain and his irascible crew of scoundrels return in their soggiest saga yet.Fresh from their mishaps with Charles Darwin and the evil Bishop of Oxford, the Pirates set sail in a bouncy new vessel——purchased on credit.

In order to repay his debts, the Pirate Captain is determined to capture the enigmatic White Whale, hunted by the notoriously moody Ahab, who has promised a reward.Chaos ensues, featuring the lascivious Cutlass Liz, the world’s most dangerous mosquito, an excerpt from the Pirate Captain’s novel in progress (a bodice ripper, of course), whale ventriloquism, practical lessons in whale painting, a shanty-singing contest in a Las Vegas casino, and a dra-matic climax in which the Pirate Captain’s prize ham saves the day!

Move over, Herman Melville.

Be the first kid on your block to have the newest in Pirate satirical fiction. Wow them at parties with your Ham knowledge. Revive some sort of respect for Melville!

This is your chance to be part of the new pirate craze, so don't be left behind.

In the future (as in way, way in the future) I'll manage to get up my review of Pyrates, and even some other novels that aren't quite so heavy on the funny.

Hopefully.

Not that you'll care because you'll be reading Pirates! In an Adventure with Ahab, right?