Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Holiday Ideas #1: Make a difference, save a bunny

They’re protesting bombs, war, and fur at the train stop up from my mall. Combine that with the fact that it was Veteran’s Day on Friday to honor those who’ve fought for this country, and I was struck by the need to make that this entries theme.

Fair warning: I’m me, so I’m going to have to totally twist this and make it both book related and commercialistic, but hey, you get good Christmas present ideas.

And Christmas ideas are where it’s at, yo. Or should that be ho…as in ho, ho, ho? Eh, whatever.

Now, I know there are those who like to give money in another’s name as a gift—make a donation to save an endangered species, the environment, or feed starving children. All well and good and altruistic even if it does have a whiff of buying your way into heaven for some, but let’s face it, the person you’re buying for could also do this for themselves. They could also just as easily save an ocean, learn to recycle, or write a soldier (in honor of Veteran’s Day and all). Besides how does this support our materialistic, capitalistic society…and more importantly: how does this sell books.

You’re right, it doesn’t. Luckily I have an alternative. Yep, I have the perfect gift for that hard to buy for, twisted soul who used to sit under the hot sun and hold a magnifying glass over an ant hill. Finally, the perfect gift to combine your altruistic motives, need to gift give, and solution to his/her black humor needs all at once!

All you have to do is buy Save Toby!

Here’s what Brian and James, the two authors of Save Toby, have to say about why they wrote their book:

(from the back cover)

Congratulations on your purchase of Save Toby! You have just contributed in an important way to the survival of the greatest bunny of all time and maybe even the greatest in all the animal kingdom, or phyla. Every book counts toward the goal of 100,000 sold (net!) that will save Toby’s life. You are also contributing in an important way to the book publishing industry, which might be in even more trouble than Toby! But before Toby’s life depended on selling 100,000 copies of a book, his life was ransomed on the Internet for $50,000. That didn’t work out so well, but not because people didn’t want to save him. You see, certain grouchy people petitioned PayPal, saying mean things like, “You can’t let this crime against God and humanity continue.” Then the nice, caring people who wanted to save Toby couldn’t donate because the Save Toby! account was frozen. The grouches almost prevented Toby from getting saved. But then we got another idea--there’s no way PayPal can freeze a book! It’s one last chance to save Toby, and it’s so crazy it might work. But if it doesn’t Toby will be butchered and eaten; so maybe you should pick up two or three copies?

Hey, and PayPal rejecting them? Isn’t that against free speech? Wouldn’t that mean that by buying this book you would be protecting the first amendment?

Wow, talk about a Christmas gift that does it all: supports the economy (‘cause you’re buying it), fights for free speech, fulfills someone else’s sick sense of humor, and saves a bunny from a horrible fate.

Not to mention that it celebrates that good ol’ American ingenuity.

So make with the bunny savin’ already. Do not deny this face…or its possible fate.

Only you have the power to save Toby!


Anonymous said...

That's pretty twisted. I love it!

Candy said...

I love the website for Save Toby. I had no idea they came out with a book. The recipes on the website are the BEST. "1 3-lb. Toby, 6 small onions, chopped" etc.

The people who tend to be offended at Save Toby also tend to be offended about kitten bonsai. Those people need to get less worked up about humor websites and expend more energy, I dunno, boycott non-dolphin-safe tuna or something.

Bookseller Chick said...

Jason--twisted in the best possible way! Glad you approve, and welcome to the site. Now go save a bunny!

Candy--the recipes are included in the book, which made me laugh so hard. I love that Toby is a measurement! And I agree with you about the people who dislike the Save Toby site and book. I had some woman tell me it was disgusting that we sold the book. Personally I think their ingenius, and wish I'd come up with the idea. "I swear, Mr. Landlord, he's not a pet, he's my livelihood!"

You think they'd let me have a pet then?