I’m sure as a meme this has been done before, but for the life of me I couldn’t find a link to someone’s existing list. The few sites I did find were all geared towards grade school kids. Granted, I didn’t try very hard to narrow my search, but what the hell, it’s early and I’m still working in my first cup of coffee. Besides, we’re all still coming off at holiday weekend (yes, I know it’s Wednesday), so why strain our brains too much.
Here we go. Choose five characters from five books (name both the character and the book). Love ‘em, hate ‘em, I don’t care, but you have to want to sit down and have a conversation with them. Why’d you sit down with them in the first place and how would the conversation go (if it went at all). Have fun with it.
1. Biff from Christopher Moore’s Lamb: Love that man. We’d meet for breakfast and within the first five minutes he would have my shooting coffee out my nose due to some wise crack or another. He’d offer to heal it, but unfortunately that was Josh’s thing, so instead he’ll inform me he has the gift of tongues. I’d propose marriage, only to find out that he’s hung up on this chick named Mary. We’d commiserate over the fact that biblical love triangles are so hard to handle. In the end he’d head back to Mary and I would be left considering the ethics of cloning.
2. Inspector Lynley and DC Travers from Elizabeth George’s Inspector Lynley mysteries: Used to love them, now I’m just all depressed. We’d meet over a pint to discuss some sort of serious counseling because while I get the whole stiff upper lip, bad-things-have-happened-to-us-but-we’ve-soldiered-on thing, you guys are killing me. Killing me! Find something, anything to find a little happiness in. Anything. But make it small, and do it daily. And get some anti-depressants. I’ve had to take a three year break from reading y’all and it sounds like things only got worse while I was gone.
3. Takeo and Kaede from Lian Hearn’s Tales of the Otori trilogy. We probably wouldn’t be able to talk (language barrier and all, let’s not even take a look at the time continuance problem), but I would love to have tea with these people. Hot sips while watching the herons. Zen me out.
4. Dexter from Jeff Lindsay’s Dexter series: my favorite serial killer. Since I harbor no serial killer tendencies (that I’m aware of) I’d probably be safe meeting Dexter at a bodega for a sandwich and coffee. We’d talk blood spatter and science and I’d ignore the fact that he’s jokes didn’t quite fit the situation (even if they were funny) and that his Hawaiian shirt was making me dizzy because the man knows his business. Hopefully I would never find out why.
5. Anonymous Lawyer from Jeremy Blackman’s Anonymous Lawyer: mostly just to find out if he sounds like he does in his blog entries. I’m sure he would be pompous and such, so Anonymous Niece would have to be there as my in. Plus I would love to see how he acted around her outside of the email realm where she is the master and he is the student. This would all take place at a nice restaurant and be charged to some client’s tab, of course.
Hmm. Not as interesting as I thought it might be. Oh well, have fun with it. Make it your own. Who would you meet if you had the chance?